Then the King will say to those on his right, ‘Come, you who are blessed by my Father; take your inheritance, the kingdom prepared for you since the creation of the world. For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me.’ Then the righteous will answer him, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you?’ The King will reply, ‘I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me.’ (Matthew 25: 34-40)

First off, I’d like to thank all of you who have shared the Good News ( through referral the site ) to your beloved ones, relatives or friends in last month. The traffic of the site has risen ten times than before. I’m so grateful to the Lord for His Holy Spirit’s fire moving you to do His work. May the Lord  Himself bless and strengthen the work which has been done through us in His Kingdom. Praise God! Give all the glory to you, Lord!

People may be able to list hundreds of factors which would influence their marriage relationships. Today, we’re only going to discover a few invisible strongholds which particularly have existed in your INNER CHILD since your early lives, and these strongholds might have been the destructive roots in you for a long time and caused fatal wounds in your marriage. You might just do not recognize them before. However, the Lord Jesus can demolish these strongholds for you as long as you trust in Him. He can set you free!

Do you know that Jesus has a goal for each of us? Yes, His desire is to completely fulfill it. There is no doubt that Jesus definitely likes His children to enjoy themselves in their marriage relationships.  However, He also knows some of you are now under various kinds of trials in your marriage. He really cares for you. He can rescue your marriage. Well, do you know who ultimately will gain the benefit from being under the trials? Let’s see what God says in the Bible: “Blessed is the man who perseveres under trial, because when he has stood the test, he will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love Him.” ( James 1:12 )

I believe that transforming your child within may be more than wise to rescue your marriage. Now, before entering the main part of today’s article, please allow me to  ask you a few questions. Do you live in one side of the wall of defense and your spouse live in the other side? Would you rather spend excessive amount of time indulging yourself in different kinds of hobbies than stay with your wife doing something together? For instance, you’re alone watching TV, playing games or you’re with your friends playing golf, going fishing,….etc. Or, you’d rather work day and night in the office than go back home earlier. Would you rather focus everything on your children than spend time getting together with your husband? Or, you’d rather let your schedule filled with many clubs, classes, and church activities than spend time sharing what you think and how you feel with your husband. If your answer is “yes”, thus, I fully understand you are actually LONELY although you are alone busy with doing a lot of things. I have been there before so I know it.

When I look back my more than twenty year journey of marriage, I know I love my husband now as much as I  met him at the first glance in the Lord long time ago, and I’m sure my husband has the same feelings to me as well. I have to say we had together gone through hard time in our relationships for a period of time because our old natures were on the way of transforming. My husband and I both have dominant parents, and a lot of time our parents were just like rulers in their own kingdoms. During the long journey, thank God, I feel I’m on the way to become the WIFE God wants me to be in my marriage relationships day by day, and the influence from my mom has decreased step by step. My mom has also become one of the sisters in God’s Kingdom. She has been willing to obey God’s will gradually at her old age. This is indeed God’s grace to my family. Praise the Lord! I’m so grateful to the Lord too for I’m able to pray for my father-in- law almost every day for his salvation instead of making judgement on him. I can see him through God’s mercy now. The mercy of God triumphs over judgement! It’s hard for me to do that. Really hard. I cannot accomplish it myself. It is from the power of the Lord. Jesus does it! Jesus heals me! God’s Word frees me!

1. Matthew 5:33-37

Again, you have heard that it was said to the people long ago, ‘Do not break your oath, but keep the oaths you have made to the Lord.’ But I tell you, Do not swear at all: either by heaven, for it is God’s throne; or by the earth, for it is His footstool; or by Jerusalem, for it is the city of the Great King. And do not swear by your head, for you cannot make even one hair white or black. Simply let your ‘Yes’ be ‘Yes’ and your ‘No’ be ‘No’; anything beyond this comes from the evil one.

Around 23 years ago, 4 years after I had become a Christian,  Rev. John Standford and his wife Paula, the authors of “The Transformation of the Inner Man” were invited to come to my church for holding a healing meeting. There were a lot of people coming from different churches asking for the prayers from them. Being a young Christian, I was so curious at that time why so many people needed God’s healing. I even did not know how the servants of God ( John Standford and his wife ) would help God’s people. I remembered there were a sister with her husband from my big fellowship group came to attend the meeting as well. I didn’t know what their prayer request was until the sister was pregnant afterwards. I heard she had suffered from miscarriages a few times and was so eager to have a baby. It was so good to know the birth of the baby finally brought a lot of joy to the sister, her husband, and the whole family. Thanks for God’s grace.

“I don’t want to be a mother like my mom” shouted in this sister’s life since her early age. This was the inner OATH which was commanded to the whole body through the sister’s mind and brain. The sister was so eager to have a baby, but the oath which she had made in her just like somebody had programmed in the computer would never change and prohibited her from pregnancy unless somebody could figure it out and break it. The sister was the jewel in her mother’s crown. Her mother thought she could rely everything on her. And she really did. She brought up the smaller children for her mother so that her mother could focus on her career. How many nights the sister felt scared, cried and still must take care of her younger siblings when their mother was not at home. The sister hated her mother because her mother caused the hurt to her so she told herself she hates to be a mother and will never want to become a mother in her own life.

The other oaths such as “I will never have a baby boy.” (Perhaps she got hurt in the relationships with her dad or brother,… etc); “I will never have a baby girl.” (Perhaps she got hurt in the relationships with her mother or sister,…etc); “I will never let any man to touch me again.” (Perhaps she was raped by a man before,eg: dad, brothers, relatives, strangers,..etc); “I will take my revenge on her (mother or sister).” (Perhaps this oath will result in taking his revenge on all women or his own wife or daughter.) “I’ll never get married.” ( Perhaps the person had the severe fear of his parents’ failed marriage. )

Some other oaths don’t seem so bad but may cause some health problems. Some people might transfer their parents’ instructions to be their own inner oaths, such as “You’d better control your temper!”; “Be the best of the best!”; “You are the best”; “Never make the same mistake again!”,…etc. Sometimes I feel these certain kinds of oaths will have bad impacts on the relationships between us and others,too. I know we cannot identify every kind of inner oath by ourselves but the Holy Spirit of God can find all of them out. Praise the Lord!

2. Matthew 7:1-2

Do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measures to you.

3.  Galatians 6:7

Do not be deceived: God cannot be mocked. A man reaps what he sows.

4. Deuteronomy 5:16

Honor your father and your mother, as the Lord your God has commanded you, so that you may live long and that it may go well with with you in the land the Lord your God is giving you.

The laws of  “root of judgement and expectation” , “sow and reap” and “honor your parents”  in marriage relationships

A lot of women were ashamed of their fathers for being alcoholics, so they usually married men for being alcoholics or their husbands will become alcoholics sooner or later based on the women’s destructive root of judgement and expectation in the inner beings. If you had the fathers who abused you when you were young, you might marry the men who abused you later, too. The men who brought up by dominant mothers usually attract the women whose personalities are similar to their moms. The cycle will be: alcoholic fathers and inebriate husbands; apathy fathers and aloof husbands; abusive fathers and opprobrious husbands. Picky mothers and fickle wives; nagging mothers and annoying wives; lazy mothers and indolent wives. However, if the children didn’t make any judgement on the parents or ever made judgements but intervened by God’s grace, the children won’t reap what they sowed. Sometimes when the daughter made the judgement on the irresponsible mother instead of the father, the daughter can even reap through her husband what she sowed.  The other time we can also reap through our children, families, relatives, colleagues, or ourselves,…what we sowed!

5.  Romans 2:1

You, therefore, have no excuse, you who pass judgement on someone else, for at whatever point you judge the other, you are condemning yourself, because you who pass judgement do the same things.

Have you ever said you would not yell at your children just like your mom did to you when You were young? Unfortunately you might exactly do the same thing. Have you ever noticed that some people around you suffered from their marriage because they  committed adultery? Or the friends around you might have divorced several times, and they are still struggling in their marriage now. Look at their background. They might just exactly do the same things as their parents did before.

Dear friends, we pray God’s grace to come upon you. The Lord Jesus can not only rescue your marriage but also save you. If you’re willing to know more about Jesus and His salvation, please check the previous article dated 09/16/12. We expect you to become our brothers or sisters in the near future! Praise the Lord!

Dear all, do you know how to completely get out of the bondages in your lives? Please allow me to emphasize it one more time: recite God’s Word, and put God’s Word into practice. I believe after your sins have been forgiven, your inner beings have been healed and strengthened , no longer weak, then you can put God’s Word into practice! You will be blessed when you put God’s Word into practice. It’s the biblical promise. Let’s see what the Bible tells us:

Psalm 1 :2-3

But his delight is in the law of the Lord, and on his law he meditates day and night. He is like a tree planted by streams of water, which yields its fruit in season and whose leaf does not wither. Whatever he does prospers.

James 1:25

But the man who looks intently into the perfect law that gives freedom, and continues to do this, not forgetting what he has heard, but doing it–he will be blessed in what he does.

Next month we’re going to offer you the steps of healing. Thanksgiving is around the corner, too. I wish to collect the testimonies of God’s healing on you if you have any. Please e-mail me your testimony to miriamandyou@gmail.com. Thanks for sharing.

I’m looking forward to seeing you again at Thanksgiving. May you keep on being in the wonderful inner child healing and transformation process!

God bless your marriage,

Miriam White